In your opinion, do we relate in the afterlife much as we do here on Earth? According to the Bible, Jesus said, In heaven we neither marry nor are given in marriage. I know that Mormons believe in celestial marriage: that husband and wife will be together forever, as well as the family unit. My question stems from this belief or practice, but I'm not Mormon, I'm Christian. According to Mormon theology, anyone who hasn't been married in their religion won't be together in the hereafter. I have always believed that I will be with my wife if God so wishes it. What do you think happens to the marriage unit in the afterlife - does it continue or not? Or does that happen only if the husband and wife want it to continue?

-Gary

Dear Gary,

I've been asked this question many times over the years because people naturally want to know if they'll be with their loved ones in the afterlife.

What if someone was married more than once? Which wife will he be with in Heaven? We make a choice there just as we do on Earth, and can be with whomever we choose.

I find the Mormon religion fascinating, for they have some interesting explanations about various aspects of life and death. I was honored to travel to Israel with the Elders of the Church of the Latter Day Saints in 1980. (They were dedicating a garden there.)

At that time, I was a dancer on a small cruise ship, and this was the only time I ever had a wardrobe malfunction. The top of my costume just fell off as I emerged from a magic trick I had done a thousand times without incident, which proved to me once and for all that God has a sense of humor.

I never knew if the audience thought I did that on purpose. It was The Most Embarrassing Moment of my Life, but the Mormons were so nice to me before and after, and they never mentioned it. During the weeks we were at sea, I visited with them at some length to gain more understanding of their beliefs.

They felt that if you live the principle of LDS, when you die you go to Heaven with your Celestial Family. I think that's the sweetest thing! I'm certain we ARE reunited in death with those we love, and that's how we get talked into reincarnating.

While my own experiences in life have led me to that belief, everyone has a different feeling about it. I see and speak to the dead every day, so I know that if a person believes they'll be with someone after death as they were in life, that is what becomes true for them.

So if you believe in a literal interpretation of the Bible, it's doubtful you'll be married in Heaven. On the other hand, if you believe you'll be reunited with your loved ones, and if you believe in Heaven, then if you go there, you'll get to be with people you love.

I don't know that God has time to wish us to be with someone in Heaven; that's probably left to us to decide once we get there. I'm skeptical that God wishes anything in particular regarding personal relationships between people. We have free will, and we make choices and face the consequences of those choices.

The key to these afterlife reunions is LOVE, for love is stronger than anything on Earth and just as strong in other places too.

Susyn responds:

Dear Gary,

Thank you for your intriguing question. When we find someone we want to spend the rest of our lives with, there's always a heartfelt hope that our bond will endure for all eternity.

Most religions base their beliefs on certain scriptures or writings. Lots of confusion tends to arise when these teachings are interpreted by different people to have different meanings.

You're correct in stating that the Mormon religion has specific beliefs and teachings about eternal marriage. If Mormons want to be with their spouses in the afterlife, they must be married in the Mormon temple.

Of course, religions of all kinds have various requirements for belonging to their church, and if you study history, you'll notice that many of these tenets have been changed or altered over the years. This naturally makes them appear to be artificial, man-made ideas as opposed to divine decrees.

We must keep in mind that religious practices and rituals are basically designed to dictate members' behavior or sway them toward certain beliefs, and as we evolve as a global community, the whole world is having to embrace new ideas, tenets and directions every day. With divorce and multiple marriages becoming increasingly common, even longstanding religious traditions and teachings are being restructured to keep up with the times.

While it's human nature to try and figure out what awaits us in the afterlife, since we can only speculate about these mysteries, our efforts always fall short. Personally, I don't believe that the spirit world recognizes the concept of marriage, just as it doesn't concern itself with gravity, bodily harm or time. There's no need for marriage, money or procreation in the afterlife, nor any biological drive to seek them out.

However, our souls, hearts, and spirits do continue on after death, and we will always naturally long to be with our loved ones. Whether we're missing a spouse, friend, parent or child, if we choose to do so, we are able to reconnect with those we love, and travel together again when we cross over.

The theory that we incarnate with the same people throughout our many lifetimes reflects this dynamic, and holds true whether we are traveling on the earth or spiritual plane.

So you can rest assured that the people you hold most dear in this lifetime will be waiting for you in the spirit world with open arms, or vice versa. Then you can pick up your connection right where you left off, and walk into the proverbial celestial sunset together.